I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
I had a dream you and I were having sex. It was pretty romantic.... until you started pulling out toys.
i found your underwear in my bra... i dont even remember how this happened.
shit. all i remember is the look on your moms face.
first off, his name is dougie. strike one.
its a vaginal recession for me, ill take what i can get
Are we responsible for the snowmen doing it doggy-style in my front yard?
You ass. You're not the one who bought me flowers, so obviously you will not be the recipient of the blow job of gratitude.
We met a guy named Raymond. You called him ramen all might and told him you would eat him up, "like sex, on a budget."
I get hit on by the prison guards every time i go to see him. Seriously.
Thanks for getting me stoned. My manager started quizzing me about the menu and I struggled until he asked me to describe the tortilla soup. I said "tasty"
I'm sorry but if you can't drink a bottle of wine without a glass, I do not think we can be friends.
I had to puke in a ditch beside a cow pasture and like 50 cows just stood there and watched. I could feel the judgment.
I almost forgot to feel shameful, if that answers your question.
Just realized how behind i am. Will gradually increase drinking until i don't remember that i missed an entire year of class.
He sided with his father, so I slashed his tires. I’d say that’s a fair trade.
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