i only hope i can top last weeks sext session
the ***** family is living proof that there are no more lifeguards in the humen gene pool
i think i have herpe
just one?
sometimes i wish i could find another girl that loves my dick as much as she does
i feel like she has dreams of it being like a person saying hey lets go play
he was terrible at kissing, so i just kept letting him motorboat me. he seemed very pleased with my choice
i feel like i am carryihg a baby. a baby made of alcohol.
It was a perpetual wrestle for who got to be on bottom. Laziest hookup ever.
Can I just say I love that you have a kegorator on your wedding registry?
to improve your porn experience, just imagine a slow speaking older English man narrating it all like a Nature documentary
How long can I keep it classy to hook up in my old office building? Two more years? Does it get weird after 30?
Trying to ignore the fact that a kid I hooked up with twice just gave me spare keys to his house ... and car.
so in case you needed a ticket for the Hot Mess Express, I'm the conductor now.
I know EXACTLY where things went wrong with her...I didn't use Cheetos as a wooing tool.
Dude i woke up today by a pile of fried chicken and wearing a bra
.......stop going to frat parties....
Her hot older sister walked in on us, looked me up and down, then stared straight at her and said "I call sloppy seconds on this one" then left. I'm still debating on how I feel about that.
Randomize
