and he thought i came like four times in 2 mins. my leg just kept cramping up
either way he was missing a nipple.
i can tell by the sound of your bed that he isnt that good at sex.
After the tests come back negative, you guys will look back on this evening with fond memories...
im proctoring the SATs right now and im still drunk from last night. i really wanna tell these kids that this fucking test doest mean shit and they will just be constantly drunk once in college.
You're being dramatic. You can calm down, or you can piss off. Either way, I ate your burrito.
Help. Me. He just whispered 'prepare yourself', & sprayed hairspray everywheres to make sure the 'air was crisp'
You better not fucking die before we have sex while you blow fire. I'm serious. Don't mess up my sexual bucket list.
He got me coffee AND filled up my gas tank. He must've fucked another girl in my car..
you're going to have to hot glue me into my dress tonight. there's no way out.
College: when you have to set an alarm to start drinking
SURVIVAL MODE. WE CAN DO THIS. Celebratory survived-working-christmas-retail sex to follow
Where the condoms are as broken as my dreams
No man we're leaving now. The party will probably be busted soon. O and a bitch started throwing knives around the place, like real actual knives.
My heart wants him and my vagina wants him...to have a bigger dick.
Randomize
