i am sick of getting naked and seeing how fat i am.
erin looks like she hung out with the sham wow guy last night. she's got the beat up hooker look goin' on
there is a homeless man oan crack poledancing on a fence... now hes humping it...
There was a pool of blood on my desk and we still don't know who it belongs to. missed a good party, man.
I thought she was mad at me, but then we did a pose off and I realized we're friends for life
Its not monday til someone throws up in the hallway
There are pictures of you on the shoulders of some old guy dressed as borat
I'm pretty sure they changed the plants at the grocery store because of us
Hooked up with 8 guys, puked 4 times, got a few bruises, and my face is still numb... I think this visit has truly impacted my college decision
It's official, I need to start putting my vagina's needs before my own.
STOP WHATEVER YOU ARE DOING AND GO OUTSIDE RIGHT NOW. THE MOON LOOKS LIKE CATWOMAN
I just wish my penis was a person so I could give him a high five.
The fake number she gave me was for Pappa John's. Now I have a large pepperoni on the way.
You KNOW it was a good night when you find French fries AND taco remnants in your bra when you get home...
He went three whole days without making a star wars reference, of course he got sex
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