Did u get laid? I went and bought lube and fleshlighted it while moaning ur name the whole time.
It was at that point the crowd that gathered realized i wasn't getting arrested, and passed the sobriety tests. I got a standing ovation from 25 strangers
her teeth looked like a whores toenails, i was too horrified to
And he just showed me his vera bradley wallet...
No stitches, just platelets and will power
I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
i've never seen someone fall down the steps so gracefully... i think im in love
It's a goat... but where the fuck did it come from?
I wore home his HoHoHo boxers. I've never felt such a connection to an article of clothing.
Sangria Flip Cup was probably one of our worse drunken decisions
Is it weird to befriend your older alcoholic landlords?
Secrets from the porn industry: liTERALLY SHOVE A SEA SPONGE UP YOUR VAGINA GO ON DO IT
I think I should've done my makeup before I took the acid. Because now I just feel silly looking at myself in the mirror
We're both fucking guys named Frank. Our friendship was meant to be.
Oh my fucking god!! There is a barefoot white guy with a fucking ninja sword in the middle of the street next to the pride gas station swinging his sword at peoples cars!! He almost got me. 3 people swerved off the road and stopped. I told a cop.
Randomize
