tell ils to like buy her flowers and like a balloon that says, sorry I tried to fuck your sister. I think hallmark makes some of those cards too.
Psycho is an understatement. U were running around the house screaming IM UNDER THE IMPERIOUS CURSE
he just kept going up to random asian girls and yelling at them for breaking up the beatles
when did we get so old that our friends started having LEGITIMATE children?
I have vodka an food stamps. At some point today, that will undoubtedly turn into jello shots.
I left him a voicemail saying i went through with the abortion and he texts me back one thing... the bbm "phew" face. really?
i'm not a hellocoptur, but youer in a dorm ans im un a dorm
the water pistols in the freezer are full of voddka.
I was preparing to do my walk of shame shirtless, but then I found my sweater, wallet and keys neatly piled under a tree in the park.
he made his penis look like a sprinkler when he was coming. it was pretty cool actually.
This guys mom bought us a 24 pack and drove me and 8 others to a frat house... Hello moms weekend.
at wine tasting. Can i cleanse my Palate with a frito?
My legs have surpassed "hairy" and entered the territory of "furry". Maybe I should just suck it up and shave already
No now I'm curious!
You told the cop you where the star of the Track team and tried to run away. So yeah, i'm not surprised.
My manager just held my hair while I threw up in a dumpster. New low.
Randomize
