Doo rag and shades in the bar. You are missing your future husband.
She looks like Robin Williams dressed as a frog.
I feel like your standards for women is like rent-a-centers standards for credit.
...i had to draw her a diagram of her own vagina. including a little arrow to the clitoris. shouldn't it be the other way around?!?
I'm sorry I ignored your high cries for help while you were grating cheese on my dog.
Now you know for the next time you go in the basement to wear a helmet
They should really start adding the average cost of day drinking to our cost analysis sheets. Does FAFSA cover this? No. It doesn't.
Found my bike today. On top of the garage. I'm not even going to ask myself why.
oh you know, the usual stuff. getting kicked out of bars and sleeping in cars.
If throwing a bottle across the bar, hitting a skank in the head and not getting caught was an Olympic event, you'd bring merica the gold every time
you fail at everything in life besides blacking out
You can't call dibs on the bed... every time you party you KO in the bathtub
And I'm laying here struggling with the notion that I need to put pants on.
It was horribly awesome. Its like looking at the sun, you know its bad for you but I just couldn't stop looking.
The Adderall says yes, but my body says no.
Randomize
