her nose should be used as a dorsal fin
I have big tits. Rules don't apply to me.
I wish guys would just cum water 'cause you don't have to worry about being pregnant and it'd be like a squirt gun fight
I guess I tried to spit on a homeless man on the walk home...Out. Of.Hand.
My dick was out way too much saturday not to get laid
I'll still trying to understand the context of your "punch her with my cock" comment.
How much is that going to cost?
A lot of beer.
And then he serenaded me with "Pimps don't cry" from 'The Other Guys'. If that's not love I'm not sure what is
I SMOKED SO MUCH I SKIPPED A DAY.
After owing so much in back child support they should make vasectomy a mandatory
I was stuffing my vagina with gummy bears last night having him eat them out of me. Team Haribo for the win!
When breakfast is a rum &coke at the office Christmas party you know it's gonna be a good day
I'm slacking. We've been hooking up for months and I have yet to bang him while he's wearing the clown mask.
Change the sheets & put your dick in the dishwasher. I'll see you in an hour.
You kept sayin "its alright, I'm pre-med" to everything we said. EVERYTHING.
Randomize
