Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
Can someone please explain to me why I woke up looking like Ziggy Stardust
well since you're still married, you will be paying for my abortion right?
Found a pint glass in my snow pants.
to which he commented "you must really like me on top". I didn't have the heart to tell him that was the only way the room stopped spinning
You left a trail of sequins from your dress incase we got lost
He graduated with honors. I've seen him kneeboard on dry ground and run a razor scooter into a wall...anyone can graduate with honors
i hope this doesn't spoil anything but there are vikings and it is awesome
Would I chase a raccoon with a flaming stick sober?
My night was too much. My morning is even more. Help. I need to teleport the fuck out of here.
They are the perfect team. One always has weed, the other always has cigarettes. They're like the Batman and Robin of drugs
I have bite marks all over my ass. Is that an acceptable excuse for missing class?
We ended up on their roof with our pants around our ankles shotgunning beers at one point.
Did I seriously answer the door for a home delivery of weed from you and your boss while wearing last night's 80s rockstar face paint?
Do you think if I had a tempurpedic bed he would still be able to feel me fingering myself after we have sex?
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