sometimes i wish i had a whole other life to spend on youtube
Set off the fire alarm in our dorm at 2:30 am last night. 150 Naked people wrapped in towels shared a bag of popcorn with me as we watched the firefighters frantically search for my burnt popcorn in the building.
OMG THAT WAS YOU?!
i just declared my major based on how close the department building was to our apartment. laziness has been brought to a new level
Congratulations, you have helped solved the mysterious disapperance of Dani's phone which was found in the munchies cabinet next to the oreos. Your reward is star power as well as a fat ass bowl of Nebula. You may proceed through the wardrobe and into Narnia for your prize.
No. I want him to marry me so we can spend our lives together. I also want a to-scale model of his genitals to mount above my fireplace
I pretty much landed into this relationship penis first
I woke up on a navy base in a different time zone. I'm never leaving tallahassee again.
Its not that it wasnt fun. Its just I got a tooth knocked out and that was my second time being arrested this year
my grandma just gave me a shoebox fulled to the top with tootsie rolls and condoms with a not that said "enjoy college, find a big cock" i'm not sure how I feel about this
I just remember yelling "BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS" while I was streaking
I tried to help you up but you said "let me dance it off"
Do you know how awkward it is to get a dick pic while working at babies r us?
I've had more sex since the twins moved in than I'd had in the previous four years. They are the best wingman ever.
Because you put the dick in ridiculously amazing boyfriend. And you deserve to have nice things happen to your penis. That's why.
He just got out of surgery, almost died from shooting him self with an arrow.
Randomize
