You can call me Bill Clinton. I brought 2 good looking Asians home last night.
everyone knows that carl winslow was the sexiest man in die hard.
I just remember standing in the shower with you eating chips.
Only your vagina holds the key to what happened last night.
You were peeing on yourself thinking it was the sprinkler in your yard
Although last time you were unsure about someone they flipped a golf cart on me.
Apparently I walked up to him, mumbled something incoherently, then started to make out with him. Why does this always happen.
We established that I was in 5th grade when she was in her final year of grad school. Her daughter is also in 5th grade.
When you can pee with one hand accurately while texting, you drink too much.
Gotcha. How bad is it?
Well to compare it to something I would say it what's that walls would like inside the primate exhibit at the zoo after a group of monkeys finished throwing feces at each other all afternoon
I just rolled a blunt at my desk. Happy early Friday!
you told me I was being patronizing because I didn't want you to run barefoot across a construction site
I mean I did fuck her boyfriend, the least I could do is post happy birthday on her Facebook wall.
I went looking for them and I pulled my pants down and peed on the lawn. I found my phone in the same spot in the morning.
Can u pick up some lemons on the way? I have Tequila and a sore throat..I need them for both
Randomize
