My family just suggested tequila shots. I had Vietnam style flashbacks.
she came to the game with a camelback filled with booze. except it was only the bag part so she duct taped to her back
I was just handed a mimosa the size of my head. Stay tuned.
I wish I still had pics from the prostitute I paid/dated
You could give me a blowjob later? :)
I meant do something romantic..
Blowjob In the moonlight?
This is the time you want your cat to have telepathy with you. To know if the guy downstairs left.
i like feelif swiord YOU ARE A GOD
I don't save the phone numbers of guys I don't like. That way it's a surprise when a random number texts me and tells me I have great tits.
It blows my mind that pandora doesn't have an : I want to lay in bed in the dark and be sad and cold and eat frozen mangos and chipotle all day station
So apparently someone caught him as he was falling. And carried him around the rest of the night.
Honestly it's a super power. I can try it a million different ways and nothing happens. Donnie casually says "ok this is now a toppless party" and it all kicks-off
someone just got arrested on campus...
holy fuck look at all that cocaine
My date bailed but I got to take a nap so I'm cool with it.
The moment when you go to plug in someone else's phone in your car and your lube is in the way. Don't mind that it's just my center console car lube. Normal.
Do normal couples celebrate occasions naked with Chicken McNuggets and BBQ sauce?
Randomize
