he thought i was a dude.
It's really awkward to greet the pastor when I know I've licked chocolate syrup off his daughter's chest.
i have no idea who im with but someones making meatballs. im going to stay.
i just farted in the library and heard some girl yell it was sulfur gas. can. not. move.
Word to the wise: learn how to ask "What is my bail posted as" in French before traveling abroad.
Adams eating in the shower, he says it's one of his favorite places to eat. Btw it's milanos he's eating, he says he loves italy too.
My dad told me my only assignment from now til graduation is to not die. it's a legit concern for him.
I need to figure out how to tell my doctor that I don't want to fix my possible fertility problems until AFTER I'm done whoring around in my 20s.
As I sit on the toilet at 4 am I realize tonight could have gone a lot better
Ahahhahaha I'm not that stupid but then again I thought cabo was in Africa until yesterday
Traded my phone for pizza, then got it back this morning....successful night
If you value your immune system buddy, walk away from that one.
Also was told that I was her "third favourite booty call" - I'm taking this a good thing right?
It's a podium place so yeah...
He's gone. He left a note but all it says is "Dear Neil" followed by a drawing of a hand flipping the bird in the direction of a butt.
got cock blocked by the cops again. two of the cops were the same ones from that t bell incident and they recognized me... they still dont like me
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