Tell her to GTFO!!!!! JAI HO!!!!!
I don't get why Lindsay Lohan doesn't just blame her bad behavior on her twin sister from the Parent Trap. I mean nobodys seen her since.
Things got outta hand once she told me to water-board her with Patron.
Can you explain to me the broken disco ball in my front yard?
Dude, all I remember was you grabbing random girls, yelling "It's a rap video!" and pouring high-life on them.
I got to explain to the guys at work today how i had no choice but to go to a gay bar because I was handcuffed to a lesbian.
Let me stew on this while im plucking my nipple hairs and showering.
You should have seen the pharmacists face when I paid for my inhaler refill and a box of condoms.
Is this the guy that did shots off my ass at the beach? Haha
I have to masturbate tonight while watching every Paul Walker movie ever made. It's what he would have wanted. RIP Paul.
He told me we shouldn't hang out because it would be weird and then snap chatted me a picture of his dick
I'm bringing my passport in case we get drunk and wind up in Mexico
She asked me to dress as captain planet for halloween and told me she was gonna suck the pollution out of my dick.
In what world does 'I'm awake' at 2:30 in the morning on a wednesday translate to 'let's fuck' in the span of one text? Where has the romance gone?
Just sent a nude with the caption "seasons greetings from our family to yours"
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