We were so bored at work tonight that we were in dry storage taking turns pouring the boxed wine we use for cooking into each others' mouths. I think I'm starting to understand the "problem" aspect of "drinking problem."
I just cleaned my sheets and decided to do a black light test. My headboard is a masterpiece.
Nothing says "This dudes gotta go" better than a boner on your back waking you @ 5 in the morning
Took his v-card last night. Yet another experience I didn't expect to have in my thirties.
she said we were using the spray butter as air freshener
I'm in the city buying alcohol. I just got warned by a homeless man on the street that I shouldn't look so pretty "in these parts"
ill give you food and tequilla and penis and joy
when he pulled his cock out I told him he'd brought a knife to a sword fight
Well his ex just grabbed his dick and told him yep Ill call u later
Halfway through she said I was exactly like she imagined. So many things have been stroked this night.
i still can't believe he got laid by going to the bar and handing out "cuddle buddy" application forms
Three Asian guys got on the elevator with a handle of Hennessey and a sleeping bag. This is not the start of a joke.
I'm sorry that you wanted to get laid and I all I did was play with your new cat instead.
i just had to ask the gas station attendant what state i was in... winning at life.
im in missouri by the way.
She said my penis was powerful and magnificent
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