dude i doubt hes gay
I CAUGHT HIM BEATING OFF TO MENS HEALTH!
Do you think if Santa was real that he's have a big penis?
No subtext here. People are naked.
Can't wait to go see my drug dealers baby being born. He rolled all of the "it's a boy" cigars into blunts.
I'll be accepting presents in the forms of drinks, drugs, and orgasms. So any or all of those will be fine.
Nothing like wearing your heels and smelling like henney in the afternoon
Covered in confetti and bad decisions
He smashed a plastic chair leg on a tree stump, threw himself into the side of our metal enclosure, stomped on the wreckage for a bit and then punched the fire.
I just watched the lion king for the first time in years. It's like the equivalent of a really good blow job.
50% drunk capacity currently
I achieved the level of drunk I wanted even with the length of dress I was in..
He sent me a snap of him eating a tamale shirtless. I think I might be in love.
LOCK HIM DOWN.
I'd like to preapologize if you or your mom see me naked at some point this weekend.
I got sprayed in the face with titty milk and I'm still so traumatized
I know what I want to do this Friday. However, it might end in me getting kicked out of an arcade and a mini golf course.
She's so nice... She deserves all the dicks.
Randomize
