Cold hands, warm shart.
the next pure michigan commercial i see, i am going to pee in a fucking lake
What wine goes with Cap'n Crunch?
dude all my bootycalls are going to Eclipse tonight... Do I really want it that bad?
So he thinks I sent him a picture of my boob last night, but it was really just a close up of my arm.
Absence makes the cock grow harder.
Right now I can't do anything that will ban me from donating plasma. That is a legit source of income for me.
me neither. i remember bell pepper tequila but not why or yelling
Hahaha, I forgot about doing shots out of the bell pepper
She just gave me a free latte.
Correction. She just have you a frothy, creamy path to that vagina.
I'm so in the Halloween spirit, I zombified my all of my nudes on my phone. Tell me this isn't creative.
He wanted me to blow him while he did curls and looked at himself in the mirror. Not sure if gay or ego maniac.
I just shaved my pubes into a heart shape. if that doesn't scream romantic idk what does
we had sex in his office so i figured it was appropriate to like his company's page on facebook
Bro i just made a pipe out of a mechanical pencil and the top to an eye drop bottle. Does that make me some kind of pot god?
I bonged champagne. And did keg stands. What in the actual fuck am I doing with my life?
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