We ran out of things to say while we were playing Never Have I Ever so we started playing I Have Done This... Have You?
It's my birthday, I plan on masturbating and boating, maybe even masturbate on the boat.
Headed to the bar now. If I smell faintly of latex and tuna, it's just the new scent I'm trying.
They don't allow McDonald's in the ER. Go figure
I just want to know what horrible accidents of evolution allowed that tiny penis to exist
Dont worry bro, i'll be the designated kayaker. I wouldnt want u to be drinking and kayaking.
Before we rave about the healing powers of your penis, remember it nearly killed me as well.
I am a woman. I need to be selective about the porn I stream on my phone. Who knows if my cell will ever get lost, who will see it and what they'd think otherwise. Keepin' it classy tampa.
We need to get stoned and watch Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles 2. This has become a priority. Schedule accordingly.
I hung my underwear from the tree in his front yard. Consider my territory marked.
Also I am throwing a blaZer over what I wore to bed and calling it an outfit.
with the way the semester is going, being a stripper is starting to sound better and better everyday
I’m a go ahead and fuck down ATL. So when I leave in January I’ll have no regrets.
I'm sitting here drinking whisky and listening to The Wiggles, I don't need a social life
He fucked me so hard my hair extensions fell out
Randomize
