currently walking past a fire hyrdrant with a hose already attatched.. this could be dangerous..
how do flat chested girls get laid?
Hungover Fun Fact #4: Eating a grilled stuffed burrito WILL make you blow chunks in the ice maker at work.
yeah, you were trying to hump the doorman.
when did we get a doorman?
we were also in the wrong building...
she's telling me all about the love triangles of her sims. you tell me how it's going.
The last thing i remember was high fiving everyone on the planet.
not my fault hes the one that tried to cuddle after. said he wanted to spoon away the shame.
The girl I hooked up with in exchange for Ramen freshmen year is living with the girl I currently wish to bang.
Try oodles of noodles this time.
You would be so proud at how green we're being. Re-using last night's jello shot containers.. saving the world one step at a time
It was super embarrassing when I had to tell my brother, in front of my mother, that my wifi password was Drinkupbitches. Thanks for providing that lovely family moment.
I feel horrible. I brought her to your house like a late night pizza delivery and dropped her off.
Stop sending me pictures of you naked. This violates the friend zone agreement.
So I told him "To answer your question yes I am naked making pizza pops in your kitchen"
Afterwards he face timed like four of his friends screaming he banged the hot intern.
What the hell happened to the sandwich meat I just bought?
After you smoked, you made 8 ham sandwiches.
Guess that explains the mysterious disappearance of the bread...
Randomize
