So the bouncer told me I could leave the easy way or the hard way. I told him I was going to make him earn his 10 bucks that hour.
Apparently you chose the latter.
I am so high I am beginning to unironically like Vanessa Carlton.
So at this point...I'm sure you heard the story about Saturday night
Remember when we were mad at her for brining her mom on spring break? She just won the wet t-shirt contest. I think we owe her an apology.
I don't care. I'm going to fuck John's friend and it's all your fault.
I just got turned down by a drunk fat chick. At my own birthday party. God hates me.
who has not yet felt my sugrcially enhanced boobs. HurryI am at the bnar and it is 1:15 am
I keep telling myself last night was not real, not real, not real. Then I remember I can't move. This hangover is too fucking real.
I just got a call from the front desk apparently one of my feiends was dropped off by a handicap bus passed out in a wheel chair unlv is goig down
If I had really thought it through, I would have bought some Depends, popped one on and made this night my bitch.
I probably should have eaten more before I started shotgunning beers at 9am, but it was so much damn fun.
Note to self. The tub labelled "not water" does not contain water.
You seriously don't remember crying about how much you miss your mom right before we hooked up?
I should be free tonight unless my 5 speed vibrator arrives in the mail today, than we might have scheduling conflicts.
fyi my negative pregnancy test is taped to the fridge...i'll take it over an A+ any day. be proud.
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