I decided that $2 and a kiss on the cheek was a great tip for the pizza girl. No one is REALLY sure how much I've have to drink.
he kept whispering yes yes yes yes the entire 15 minutes. i almost wish it was a quickie.
She gave me a bj in her parent's kitchen while I ate the rest of her mom's birthday cake. Fuck. Yes.
The bouncer said he wanted to but BBQ sauce on my legs. That Mystic tan has already paid for itself.
Just spent the last three hours in the library successfully refreshing facebook
someday when you wake up in a dumpster we'll have to have this conversation again...
You do realize that we got a stripper to do the YMCA for us on the main stage... Right?
It's never too late to be topless.
Very impressive. My GPA is the same amount of orgasms I can offer tonight (valid only tonight): 3.5
I'll just be sleeping in this laundry room. Come get me at bar close.
he's singing something in russian and knocking over my plants with his dick, get his drunk ass out of my apartment
HE STUCK IT IN THE FISHBOWL WTF
My boyfriend told me that I said I wanted to "feast on her vagina"... Glad I don't remember.
He gave me a box of cheez-its after sex, does that make me a hooker?
I’ve cut back on drinking and now my body can’t fight off all the bad germs without the alcohol. That’s why I keep getting sick
Was picked up in the middle of a bar full of people...apparently I'm not tall enough to reach for drunken makeouts. I'm proud of myself.
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