Ive never seen someone more dtf than a soaking wet drunk girl who stumbles into your backyard.
All he did was lie there and used his hands to keep pace. He was like the metronome of sex.
We are, if nothing else, classy enough to leave our 10 mini bottles of wine in a polite line on the floor of the movie theater.
I have green food coloring in my hair and just got a text from "Guy in the Yard"...so this morning is going just as you might imagine.
Omg do you remember last night you kept pointing to your vag asking who wants to play this like a fiddle hahaha
My favorite thing about your netflix account "suggestions for you" section: Russias Toughest Prisons is followed immediately by Strange Sex
I still can't get the taste of her nipples and the udon noodles out of my mouth
just passed the gas station where we took pregnancy tests. memories.
He called his dick the "gentle giant"
I can't tell if this is a hangover or just a perfect combination of shame and regret
...Just hit my fuck buddy with my car.
Between his smile and monumental dick even the virgin mary woulda blown that man and I am far from the virgin. I didn't stand a chance.
so i just met a former male stripper who has a lion king tattoo. new BFF? i think yes
Actually new year, new me. I haven’t had sex yet so technically I’ve been a virgin all year.
Vegas never ceases to amaze me. Hung out with a stripper from ATL all night and got nuthin, but the next night meet a bride-to-be who gives me a bj in the elevator.
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