i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
eating toast while peeing. You think this what kanye meant by the good life?
Tonight must have been good, I have already had two cups of coffee but still couldn't figure out how to operate a door.
She had to get her inhaler in the middle of fucking...but she kept it in.
Ok. In one sink is a hairdrier. Still plugged in. The other is filled with broken glass. What do I do?!
Nvm. Bloody hand trumps dead. Also, where is gauze.
He makes this seasoned whore feel like a novice. I've met the one.
Pretty sure I can show you the text you sent me stating some interest in my penis entering your mouth if said circumstances were met.
you were upstairs in your room looking out your window and saw him puking in your bushes outside. you then proceeded to open the window and sing Come To My Window
We were messing around at his place it was going fine until he said, "I'm going to cum, hand me the shot glass"
The trainer from the tech college told me that I would pass the first aid course so long as I turned up sober. Challenge accepted
You are. Embrace it. But you are the right kind of asshole.
It's official. This guy and I are going gay for each other. We're tasting the fucking rainbow.
That's totally the Emoji for "just ran into some girl who knows I know she had an abortion"
I'm not in the business of asking people about their lizard
I meant his actual lizard not his manhood
You and I both know it takes more than prescription narcotics to keep our family down. See you around ten, brother.
Randomize
