And. No one ejaculated on anyones face. This is all wrong
Me too. I'd like to spend all next summer high and drunk and riding ponies and boys.
Dude, totally just found out that I've been washing my hair with semen for the past 3 weeks.
dont like to call her my roomate, too cordial. i refer to her as the whore that was assigned to live with me
you know its a sad night when you can actually see and hear sitcoms on at the bar
Weed smoke burps in the boss's face. Job security.
Yes, that's a picture of my balls. It isn't however an answer to my question.
she stopped mid-blowjob to explain how to acheive the haircut shown in the movie
hiding in a bush to avoid a seven dollar cab ride. cabby got out a flashlight and looked for us for like an hour. help.
What happened after I vommed in your shirt that I was wearing and threw it out the window on the highway?
Just saw a man in a motorized chair roll by drinking a beer. It's 9:45 AM. I love Louisiana.
Welp, just took a tab of acid and cracked one of three bottles of champagne... Mondays ¯\\_(ツ)_/¯
He told me he sees me like a sister then 10 mins later tried to make out with me.
Happy hour crawl turned into power happy hour turned into tequila shots turned into I'm drunk in class on Cinco de Mayo at 7 am.
You kicked my dad IN THE NUTS right when he walked in.
Sorry, man. Thought he was a cop.
Randomize
