didnt we say no more talking to eachother
it will help you get over me i promise
im horny
ok i will unlock the door
Just had a conversation with Jon gosselin
Until you fuck him in front of his kids stop wasting my time with stupid texts.
the toilet has never flushed louder then when you sneak home drunk and try to avoid your parents hearing you puke.
phone sex would be way better if there was an app for that...
EARTHQUAKE STATUS DRINKING GAME
it's not like i was drunk to the point of NEEDING help...i just wanted someone to offer to hold my hair or something.
he can show you his cooooock\nshining, shimmering, splendiddddd
Idk every story shes told me thats started with "back when i was a lesbian" has been my new favorite story
While eating post sex burritos I dripped taco bell sauce on my boob. He licked it off and asked why I hadn't thought of that before.
i actually texted him "nice to see you" but then there was a saved draft "i think about you when i get off." dodged that bullet...
So I have to borrow my moms car tomorrow to go pick up my ID from the strip club so I can board my plane tomorrow
So apparently last night while I was drunk I read him erotic fanfiction while he was eating me out. He stopped every now and then to give me feedback.
It's a mix of hot dirty sex and week old bong water
You can't just drop that I might be walking into a foursome and leave it at that
He walked in on me masturbating and on my phone but got mad because I wasn't watching porn just tweeting
Randomize
