I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
youll never guess who i didnt fuck at that party
This girl I work with, who is 18 btw, invited me to her baby shower. Do they sell abortions in gift certificate form?
The words "my birth control fell out" should never be spoken
bad decision 37: pregaming the antique store
You were humming mission impossible as we ran from the cops
I can't talk to her. I know entirely too much about her genitals to hold a conversation without mentioning them.
Can we agree to not tell mom about this?
This isnt even the most disappointing thing i know about you.
I think all the stress in my life right now can be directly correlated with never winning a game of Bop It as a child.
Don't you judge us. Sockets make ideal bowls
if this uncomfortable exchange we're having is you trying to flirt with me i suggest you stop it before someone gets hurt
come home. I need you. I'm too hungover to deal with this hangover alone
I'm pretty sure NORMAL roommates don't have to hide each others sex toys from their fuck buddies.
How is it that 364 days a year I'm the adult, but on Halloween you completely forget how to have fun and become my grandma?
So... my daughter's new girlfriend Is the daughter of the girl I dated on and off in college Who ran away because she got pregnant at my house party. My Legitimate daughter Is probably fucking my Illegitimate daughter...
Randomize
