this girl literally referred to her butthole as her "back pussy"
"The real world" DC house is on the corner of 20th and S. Wanna come with to check it out? It's my goal to be a blurred out face in their hot tub.
he just said he'd buy the porn
its a step up from the last guy
I just beer bonged a sparks. You better get your ass over here because no one is on my level yet
cab driver says "I saw your friend who opens her legs. she went home with two guys." pretty sure he was talking about you
The pick up line I used was "Grab my sack, you'll be back." Then I winked at her.
I don't want to smoke with her when she's on adderall. She carved her pumpkin for four hours & didn't say a word.
you just kept bragging about how there was a "pretty large" chance that you had pooped on the same toilet as George Clooney
But Monday we'll be living in a post-apocalyptic hellscape. Also, I'm going to a champagne tasting.
We just leapfrogged all the way to the bar.
High gym went like this: I went to Dairy Queen instead.
Is it sad that I have better conversations with his roommate before or after sex than I do with him in general?
Face washed and sleeping pill taken. Here's hoping for a more sex filled tomorrow.
Beat the bartender in a shot challenge for a free tab. I won that, and him. I never get tired of the "this is my first time with a guy.." bullshit.
How do you even...
The magic of Christmas. And whiskey, of course.
I gave him a bj as a thank you for helping. I think that's good.
Randomize