So im pretty sure the object of my emotional onterest is tired of playing with me....
can u get pink eye on your cock?
I closed that bar. Sang every Beatles song in the book. Made Somoan friends.
She passed out in the backyard, making "face down" snow angels ... so they could have a smile.
I had some like war flashbacks of giving someone a handjob and i was trying to figure out who it was.
Just think, this time last Cinco de Mayo you were holding me up and finding me passed out in the yard of that house.
I had to brake up with him.
In my experience drinking helps.
You dont want to know why?
Not really. I want to drink.
You turned byob into bring your own shit show. Good work.
What do you need? A swimsuit and a liver of steel? What else?
His cat kept scratching my feet while we were having sex. There's only room for one pussy around here. It also concerns me that he owns a cat.
You think you're smart. You're pretending to be asleep to save yourself from my hormonal pms mood swings. Unfortunately that only works against bears.
You're the only person not starstruck by him
Yes. That tends to happen after you regularly lick someone's balls.
I can't hookup with a guy in my car because it smells like Taco Bell..
My last memory of last night was being in a laundry room doing blow and admiring a washer and dryer... I think that's the earmark of old age
I guess we coulda said a little less mature audience and a little more e for everyone.
Randomize
