Im not sure if he just tripped or was star gazing, but i gave him head anyway.
I would really like to get high with Bill Nye. I'm being dead serious. Every step I take is literally a step I take because it will take me closer to Science Guy high.
We could get him to build Inspector Gadget.
I didn't know you were high TOOOO!!!
What should we drink tonight, I'm in the mood to be judged
you missed an awesome concert last night. some middle aged woman that was grinding on me kept trying to stick her hand down my pants. i ended up rewarding her tenacity by letting her hold onto it for a song, i think it made her night.
The closest thing to a sext that you will ever receive from me is a picture of pepperonis on Greg's asscheeks, clenching.
The maintenance guy asked for a box to stand on to reach the ceiling. All I could offer him was a keg.
I think that was him coming out to me. I just brushed it off
Apparently stumbling across interstate bridges is not cause for concern but screaming Wookie noises at cars is. Thanks, cops.
It is officially Christmas time in Chicago. There's a drunk hobo on the CTA singing the first 2 lines of Frosty the Snowman over and over and over.
I just encountered the same creepy guy I showed you, he jumped inside the dumpster screaming.
He must have found my secret supply of blow and took a bump before we left the house. Rude.
He could of at least asked
I woke up with $140 in twenties in my bra and have never been more puzzled.
Wow I got tittyfucked by the American Dream
I think my pussy is going to freeze to the ground
Our livers get a hall pass for 2020, right?
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