Looks like an M-80 went off in a lb. of pastrami
What about the words "You're my personal dildo" made him say "I love you"?
well, if it werent for her you wouldnt have gotten a handjob in the middle of the bar. so, maybe you should thank her too.
Is it weird being in the house without any roommates?
Nah, just masturbating louder
You've got more to offer than just money. Come on. You have an awesome rack.
I thought he was kidding when he said pretend to be a dunkin donut delivery women. This is the last time I ever role play.
im never drinking wine from a person in a wet suit and goggles ever again.
He asked me where I wanted it. I told him in the condom. He stops mid thrust and says "you're no fun" and then blew. Chivalry is semi dead.
My mom has finally acknowledged my soft spot for Russians. Finally.
I fucked him on my yoga mat. Then we wake and baked and ate granola. So yes, you could say I found my center.
I was lying I actually don't, I hope a reindeer shitted in her bed
Are you seriously getting this frustrated over a hand-job right now?
I'm sorry I keep drunk texting your boyfriend sports updates.
That's okay. He needs friends too.
Thought the acid was fake. Then my reflection didn't move when I did in the bathroom.
Want a bet? I'm a kinky and determined motherfucker with a libido that is not easily stopped
Randomize
