where are you
in your bedroom
how did you get in
your wife…
WTF
Just got kicked out of the ocean for being "unsafe".
How far into the semester do we have to be before it's ok to get drunk in between classes again?
Our professor just said "No class today, go get stoned." A guy seriously walked over and hugged him.
so its official, girls can see a boner through my snuggie.
How can you turn a kayak date down? I'M TALKING RIVER HEAD HERE.
In a car. Threw up in my mouth. Haven't said a word in 10 minutes.
Took me 12 hours to be sober again. Shitshow mission accomplished
I WISH WE COULD PLAY THE DRINKING GAME TOGETHER AND THEN BANG FOR AMERICA.
ERIN AND I ARE GETTING MATCHING VIBRATORS. I'M PEER PRESSURING YOU INTO JOINING THE CLUB. Besides we're the three best friends that anyone could have, you better not ruin that by being a pussy and not treating your pussy to awesomeness. That is all.
This is what you sent me from the other side of the pool, "Idk but thers a pool n l wanna get naked take off my trunks ill paddle with my dick"
You have no idea I looked like the porno version of Laura Ingalls Wilder
Please keep in mind you are asking relationship advice from a girl who fucked a guy just because we have the same name. Just keep that in mind.
I made out with that lesbian chick for a blunt. NO REGRETS.
Played Gay Bar on the jukebox and pissed off the Republicans here. Best day before birthday ever.
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