Just bought two budlight beers with a can of tuna at the bar
just tried to puke while my RA was trying to puke in the stall next to me.bonded for life
before we even ate breakfast we'd found an eighth of weed in some old purse she never uses. it was gone by lunch
woke up to see a man wearing a sailor hat and covered in vomit sneaking out the door. Epic night indeed.
Are you awake? Because I would like to know whether or not I should refrain from giving my evil laugh when I enter the apartment...
I won't be able to get a boner for a month
Challenge accepted.
I know you saw me get knocked out after I stepped on that rake why did you leave me there
I mean I'm sad it didn't work out but tbh he he can't unlick my booty hole or unbreak his headboard... He won't forget my name ever
You took all of your clothes off and tried to seduce me and while trying to seduce me you decided you were too drunk and passed out.
The dicks good but it's not two trains and a bus good.
her fuck buddy was butt ass naked in our kitchen making waffles but they tasted so bomb
So unmotivated today.
Who am I kidding. So unmotivated this decade.
Well, I was giving him a handy and I sighed in boredom. He heard. I had to fake moaning sounds after he asked if I sighed.
I came and sneezed at the same time. Words can't describe how awesome it was.
Were we still high when we decided to break your leg?
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