Charged a drink to your name last night. Thanks for the whiskey
just smoked a bowl with my history teacher. i love community college
I look like a poor person in the cast of Gay Oliver.
The girl next to me in class is taking notes on woman's suffrage with a girls gone wild pen.
he somehow instantly knew i was from vermont.
it probably had something to do with chasing your soco with maply syrup.
You are literally throwing a tangerine right now. Beer pong is not played this way
Who invented hangovers? And why did I make out with him and eat an entire can of chilli mixed with hot fries while screaming "YOU ONLY GRADUATE ONCE" last night?
Hey so when you left last night was i wearing shoes?
I can wear a rubber suit at three am and spank someone's ass until its sore and fuck them three ways from Sunday. And get up the next day and do their laundry. As long as once in awhile they rub my back without expecting anything
I spent the morning naked in her roommates closet because her parents decided to come over after church..
I remember being like "I can't hold both of you guy's hair back!" so I put headbands on each of you
what do you mean he's functionally heterosexual
Nice people suck dick too. I'm proof.
I just want to see you and express my feelings in a drunken manner, but in a sweet way like my english accent.
I have only been here for a week and might contributed to a dumpster fire on accident.
Randomize
