you remind me of a slightly lless slutty bristol palin
and you remind me of a slightly less retarded levi johnston
What are you drinking?
Shitty Coors light. OM NOM NOM TASTES LIKE HIGH SCHOOL
she was definitely a virgin. no ones that bad unless theyre a virgin
your sister was..
I feel like I am becoming dumber sitting here in class than I would be sitting on the couch smoking weed.
I could tell by the way he was holding my hand that he really liked you
So chef boyardee smells exactly the same after you throw it up
i literally discovered the exact same thing last week. i had the lasagna one
ravioli
When he came he kept saying "oh god oh god" and he sounded just like his dad. awkward...
You know you have a great job when you need a DD home from work at 6pm.
I literally need to be slapped with another cock just to notice it.
If I get laid, we are framing that mattress and hanging it on the wall as the place we both lost our virginities.
Quesedillas should not make me weep and drinking water should not make me feel like god is giving me mouth to mouth. Never again.
Ughhh I can't remember the last time "time fell back or springed forward" and I wasn't at the bar to argue about it :(
Nothing says Happy Holidays like sending a picture of your ass to the wrong manager.
Crust to egg proportion prescribes to a pedantic form of quiche. It's like saying breakfast pizza isn't pizza at all.
Fuck this virus. We’re finally back on campus but the bars suck parties are banned sports are canceled we eat in our rooms and can’t fucking hangout with anyone. I’m tired of virtual classes and involuntary celibacy
OMG IKR! It’s not college unless we’re puking in a toilet wondering if we’re pregnant or just hungover!
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