You don't understand, alcohol has become a thing of survival for me and without it I can't function as a normal human being
I hope so. I just start to question my lifestyle when i pee on coffee tables
I'm wearing cowboy boots and showing way too much cleavage to be in a place with no jaeger.
I showed that dick picture that your date texted you to everyone because you passed out and left your phone unattended. Your fault. Plus his cock was big so his fault too.
she stopped traffic so I could crutch across the street. Clubbing while crippled and drunk is different.
Well, you know sobriety isn't something I like to do on the reg.
You need Xanax blowdarts
How was the party last night?
I'm dangerously close to shitting myself.
Crappy Mother's Day to you! Those of us who don't have children fill the void with hot sex, sleeping in, more sex, leisurely suntanning, foreign travel, overseas sex, paying cash for sports cars, watching TV, having sex on the floor in front of TV porn, lounging around the house, or whatever the hell we want.
She's legally too young to drink and was making out with a guy who is ethically too old to drink.
i don't know if this is a cannibal joke or a sexual innuendo, and i think that's a beautiful description of our relationship.
I got drunk by myself and ended up listening to Beethoven in the dark.
I was laying out of the open window, talking with him on the phone, while we were both puking at the same time.. Guys at the party called it "true love"..
I lost the right to judge tonight
i need to get drunk because i'm an angry sober
Randomize
