so... another position just opened up(704) Oh really?(704) Is it John's?(704) Or did you find a new way to take a penis?
just thinking about him makes my vagina shudder.
Just proof I should've brought the airhorn with me to class.
Well someone has to be the Christmas slut at the family dinner. I suppose it's my year to fill those shoes.
Going to the hospital for stitches on my balls. Mom walked in on me manscaping with an electric razor. Tell NOBODY.
its safe to say i can delete the contact in my phone "brandon random bus make out" from spring break right?
i looked at my phone and realized all i had said to her the entire night was misspelled variations of "NOTHING IS THE SAME" over and over. she eventually stopped replying.
I can coach you back to consumption. Think of it kinda like Rocky II.
Dude, he threw a pool chair off of an 8 story building. It was a successful night I'd say.
Hurry there's four guys dressed up as a bachelorette party, one has a condom veil and the rest are selling candy bouquets and asking if anyone wants to get laid for $5
Whatever dude, just dont tell her your first impression was she looked like your cousin. no judgement here. just sayin.
I'm dressed in all sequins still at 9:30 in the morning and the worst part is that I actually still fit in in Vegas
I just got home and someone ate all my chicken nuggets. Bitches be asking for a death sentence?
These past few weeks have been a lesson on why you don't put your penis inside girls who live in your building.
I still don't know his name but his ass is spectacular. Like he should never wear pants.
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