Kareoke will never be a sober sport
I least I know I can't get pregnant because it's on my hair
from all the glitter we used it actually looked like a disco stick
No subtext here. People are naked.
I got really high with eric & scott.. they're discussing why words sound the way they do.. it's going to get messy
my brother came home with a bottle of vodka and his pants off. were gonna spend more quality time together.
Go ahead. I tried to back up ur budhism story but she mite be catching on
Dammit. I hoped that would work. Just tell her I'm doing my pilgrmidge to Nepal or something.
i found two dead squirrels on my front step this morning.. do you think they have something to do with my missing phone?
We found them in a dumpster making out trying to get their privacy
I feel like today should be a " im going to have sex with you cause its raining and theres nothing else to do" kinda day
His dad asked what he was doing so he texted his FATHER a picture of me wearing his shirt in his bed.
Also. I plan to spend time with you at boomers, high, teaching ourselves how to pee standing up.
You fed me pizza off a sword last night.
All I see when I think of you are dancing penis angels around your head.
holy shit I was not prepared for her to whip out that dildo
Randomize