If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
I feel like I just won at life, no connection sex and free 12 pack of beer after. Does life give out trophies, if so I want a big one.
i may or may not have just grinded on your dog thinking it was my boyfriend
So I'm about to go to his house and have "I'm really sorry for cheating on you last night" sex
I just discovered how perfect a shot glass is for putting your chicken nugget dipping sauces into. Like I'll probably do this when I'm a mother feeding my children.
Double fisting Gray Goose bottles. We've officially ruined her.
You need to take one for the team and go bang a random sample of mexicans. Cause my internets broke and I can't google mexican foreskin stats.
Couple of things: my nipples are blue and knowing that at some point I'm going to have to poop is incredibly terrifying
Well on a lighter note, I had sex in a food truck.
I try not to have friends with attractive fathers, it only brings my morals down.
Somehow she talked me into getting my dick pierced, weird first date.
Your ability to whip out your dick and take a pic anytime I text you is startling.
dad is drunk and texting us pictures of bread
I HAD TO PAY A COVER FOR THE FIRST TIME LAST NIGHT. My tits didn't get me in and I was so pissed.
we have beer and we're watching the birds have sex in our yard.
Randomize
