I think there's some kind of asian convention downtown. There are thousands and they're all wearing badges and snapping pictures. I feel like I just stepped into your worst nightmare.
he proceeded to punch 3 mailboxes in a row and when i asked him why, he said "because they were talking shit"... i need a new boyfriend. and a new life.
We hadn't had sex in so long that I started queefing and then I couldn't stop giggling... I think he's mad.
all i remember is screaming butter knifes are for pussies.
It's like, I'm the official vagina for that DJ group
Gravity stopped and i'm discussing Greek philosophy with two guys I don't know. There's someone asleep on me. We need to use their dealer.
do you think a sharp knife would stab through a cheese suit?
I wiped my mouth this morning with a pine tree branch after I threw up on the side of the road. Tis the season
you're being fucking weird and i don't like it. text me when you're not being the after picture on a poster for rehab
I shaved my legs and got a bikini wax, I don't care what I take home as long as it has a penis
I could probably be laying here naked and he'd still be more interested in this thunderstorm
It is officially settled in my mind that fuck the hot grad student is THE goal this year
He wins the giant teddy bear for getting the neuva ring on the dick
It's a Saturday night and I am in bed with two cats, a bottle of Riesling, and I'm masturbating to Iron Man. I'm great at being 21.
I think I achieved my goal of being high for 24 hours in the same week I promised myself I wouldn't smoke anymore
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