Well, I'm a guy so I don't have one, but if its anything like the inside of my nose, yes, vodka would burn.
You said that we had to leave the party together and proceeded to repeat the "ducks fly together" speech from The Mighty Ducks word for word. Soon the whole party was quite and started chanting quack..quack...quack..
i guess it wasn't a booty call since he got home from the club at 6:00 am... he told me to consider it morning sex
You are two creepy Justin Bieber quotes away from me not talking to you for the rest of the day
If I had a pelvic thrust emoticon, I would use it
Oh my god! She wrote the word ''hi'' in HAIR on the shower wall. What the fuck?!
Maybe someone other than the mad hatter should have gone with him to the ER
Just described your amazing cock to a complete stranger. I am officially the worst wingman (chick) ever.
the most romantic thing he could do for me right now would be to throw himself into traffic
You are the epitome of what awesome would taste like.
She's astronaut crazy. She will wear Depends and drive 12 hrs non-stop if you swipe right.
Challenge accepted
You know you're an adult when you start planning your hookup a week in advance
Secrets from the porn industry: liTERALLY SHOVE A SEA SPONGE UP YOUR VAGINA GO ON DO IT
I'm assuming you were here at some stage because I woke up alone, clean and in a towel with mum asking my why my shoes, dress and jewellery were in the bottom of the shower.
Think of the things uve done in the past. And ask urself "have I done worse?" If u answer yes. Its perfectly ok.
So I was having a really bad night...so I decided to steal a pumpkin.
Randomize
