I just saw my grandmother naked. again. this needs to stop now.
you were chalanging people to drink the "worlds biggest jager bomb" - a VASE of Redbull and a PINT of Jager... is it no wonder you dont remember anything?
Damn it if I pass out in the bathroom one more time this month im going to rehab...
you came home soaking wet, and when I asked where your umbrella was, you pulled it out of your bag and were so proud you kept it dry.
I honestly didn't see the problem playing beer pong In the car on the road trip home.
I need input, can I pre-game my cat scan?
I feel more comfortable going down on her then actually kissing her.
did you know that my friend knows a guy with 3 balls what the actual fuck
He wants to hookup..at the fair..this is our chance to leave him stranded with no clothes.
Shower sex is an art that should not be attemted drunk
You've created a tinder dominating monster.
I didn't want sex last night, but she charmed my dick out of my pants like a snake charmer.
His favorite stripper is going to jail. He's taking it pretty hard
Dude, I need a fuckin wingman and this could finally make us eskimo brothers, how can you pass that up?
The dog peed on the neighbors baby Jesus. No wonder she thinks we're the devil.
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