bathroom sex at kohls isnt as trashy as it seems
Im def. not watching the CMAs. If Kanyes not gonna be there whats the point?
I have a new fascination with cutting really small segments of hair off peoples heads when they're not looking.
I bought a nasal spray, my nose needs to be in order by the weekend
i dont care if i had to wear a dress to fuck her, she was super hot and i stand by my decision
Just invented taco cereal.
Meghan got a job at the bar. We're now morally obligated to drink. Is this what dreams are made of?
I got home and laid by the toilet and then alexa laid in the bathtub and sang the preamble while kayla held my hair
That night just went downhill after you pissed yourself while sitting on my lap
Shout out to this stomach virus for helping me prepare for whatever slutty Halloween costume I decide to wear.
If there's one thing I learned yesterday, it's that if I really wanted to I could be mayor of Toronto.
Come to this bar
But I'm full of food.
MAKE ME FULL OF YOUR DICK
then I ended up getting a lapdance from my TA...I love college.
I can't believe my vagina just got wished happy new year
Nothing like being naked and confused and clutching a scented candle...at least I woke up in my own bed though.
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