Iced coffee. Banana. Two dumps. Life is good.
dont ever smoke after you drink again... i dont think ive ever seen...or heard of someone throwing up and farting at the same time. that is, if you were farting.
i'm writing my speech about my 4th grade backstreet boy concert experience. that sums up how seriously i take my life.
How can it be called memorial day weekend....I don't even remember this weekend
if that dog is afraid of alcohol then he's no dog of mine
I dont think he stole the pillow. I mean if he wanted a souvenir, my thong was on the nightstand.
Might as well permanently tattoo lush somewhere on my body and show it to people when I decide to drink so they won't serve me.
Boys should be on-demand - like, once you select one, he's yours for the next 24-hours
Well I was thinking of taking him out for drinks then lecturing him about his drinking... kind of like an open minded intervention
I hate how much more visible my vomit is on snow, I need a winter vomit bush
So last night I turned down multiple drinks because "I didn't want to hold them". It's time reevaluate my decisions
Reasons I shouldn't drink... My twitter drafts keep getting more and more emotional.
I would rather suck a dick or two than go there
it's 1:30pm and i'm eating cheese while i sext. i need hobbies
Who told you he won a fight? He slammed his face into the ground while trying to do 11 push-ups
Randomize
