It's not a real calculator it's a math calculator
Contrary to popular belief alot of woman do actually enjoy sucking cock.
Ran into that hot funeral director in the bar two days after the wake. pretty sure we drunk made out.
Grandpa would have been proud
My mom just found some of our lube mixed in with my box of pots and pans. I hate moving home.
But besides the pee thing, he sounds like a nice guy.
I don't think I'm emotionally ready for this blow job.
Well idk about you but my nose is all recovered for the weekend.
Whales. Broccoli little trees giant. Magic in cat form. I want my loco and juice. Black in shower. Brb remember life.
I am definitely the only sober one on this train. And the only one not wearing a business suit. Wow, Monday Korea.
Why is there a muffler in the livingroom?
First, I just want to say that I had nothing to do with it. Second, how good is your car insurance?
Romantically speaking, I want to sit on his face.
You're not drunk til you wake your roommates up screaming at your ceiling fan
Are you ok?
They gave me a cat until I fall asleep. His name is fluffy because he's fluffy.
i definitely signed you up to receive text message notifications from a jukebox last night. Not even sorry.
I have a bottle of rum in my pocket...what does that say about me...
You come prepared
Randomize
