It's an Italian thing I guess, grew up on that shit.
I'm Irish, we don't eat cow guts unless they're blended into a fine whiskey
ok please explain why some one shaved half of my pubes?
so she called me drunk and made me stay on the phone with her while she puked.
Is it standard protocol to defriend someone after they give you chlamydia?
11am puke and rally. THIS is what I'm gonna miss about college.
Then they all walked away with the drinks I bought them, and the fat one slapped me in the face. I left and my car had been towed. Worst night ever.
I was more traumatized by the table collapsing while i was going down on you.
I swear every time I make the effort to make my hair look nice, someone jizzes in it.
It'll just be like "PENIS HERE". In case you get lost.
That's how you know it was a good night if two months later you finally realized your skirt never made it home and you found out where it was.
We just got busted fucking in the hammock by his roommate...I'm so out of here as soon as hes asleep....
I'm on A4A looking at dick pics while the CEO is on the phone trying to convince me not to leave the company
If I walk downstairs and Kelly is fucking in the laundry room again I'm gonna die
No. There is no way we have to stoop so low as to ask your dad for weed. There has to be an alternative.
If a cop comes up to me I'm whipping out my cock, swinging it around and singing the national anthem
Randomize