I just googled dawgpound, shoulda seen that pornsite coming
I wish all the girls i wanted to sleep with knew how big my dick was then id have a better chance
She got mad when I told her I'd bone her mom. She got MORE mad when her mom heard, and was flattered by it. Proud to say I attract MILFS.
My mom just blew pot smoke into my nose and called me a cat.
Also pregame at mine tomorrow?
No, no, no. Fuck you. I took a glass blowing class solely to learn how to make that bong. You shattered it and my dreams in a matter of five seconds.
He wants to know how I lost my bra in his pants....id like to know too
Just made macaroni burritos. Fukkin awesome. We'll have to try this when I'm sober.,!
So I dropped $130 while buying shots for an army ranger, got my fake taken, almost went to jail, and came out of my black out when I was talking to the cops with a stolen detour sign in my hands.
When we tried to make a video I set the camera to 3sec pictures accidentally so instead of a movie we have a flipbook of our sex.
I decided not to look up the nudes, because I believe that there is a line, and that mocking my old classmate's horrid nudes alone crosses that line.
you should never start the day with a boob text. It can only go downhill from there
I'm over here willing to be the Yoda of fucking but I guess he just doesn't want to be a Jedi.
You were trust falling into bushes
a girl walked up to me and asked if you were my brother. she shook her head and said 'im so sorry' when i said yes. what did you fucking do????????
lmao he sent me a snapped but i'm afraid to open.
i think i have dick pic PTSD.
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