i think the next time he gets me off i'm going to scream bangarang
ru fi oooo
its officail im naming my first born child brickbreaker
spending the week with her family was quite possibly the longest ive ever gone without having a boner
just heard someone say they saw a guy puke while riding a bike across campus without stopping
there is way too much butter on my body for this to be okay
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
He's a little cute, in a dorky, I-know-for-a-fact-his-cock-is-huge kind of way
It is unclear if my flaming esophagus is hangover induced.
We call her skankles because she's a skank and she has cankles, I thought that was obvious
Please don't pee your pants in the cab. One more time, and im pretty sure the cab companies will refuse to pick you up anymore
Did body shots with a guy... Ended up being the ref of my volleyball game... So that's why we won
I think he might be using me for sex. I also think I might be ok with that.
Poor guy. Tried so hard to get out of the friend zone. I had to make out with someone in front of him to put him in his place.
long story short, the bouquet was used as a sacrificial torch
Naw dude theres seriously a lobster in my sock drawer. Why?
Randomize
