at some point when you're making out with the ex girlfriend of your ex fuck buddy who happens to be the ex boyfriend of the girl that you just got drunk with who was hitting on your current fuck buddy who is best friends with your ex boyfriend, it just hits you: oh my god i need to get out more and expand my social circle.
I just sold a pizza for the ability to listen to spice girls.
I hate the Packers so much, I wouldn't cheer for them if they were playing al Qaeda.
What? Cold floors are soothing when you have a hangover. How am I supposed to pass that up. Even if I'm at my parents house
Hes still not moving. At what point does 'hungover' become 'hospital-time?'
I don't know what's worse....that fact that my dog ate my vibrator or that he later puked it up on my bed
he confused my yawn for an orgasm
I am fine. Katie thinkr i broke things pole dancing. I am coherant.
Nothing says love like couples STD testing
Nothing says breakup like the results
Still at home. Videotaping hamsters.
Dude if I call tonight please answer and just say "NO, dont do it."
BAT SHIT CRAZY
It's you're fault, even though I never called
You're the only person not starstruck by him
Yes. That tends to happen after you regularly lick someone's balls.
Yes, if by 'finishing my business' you mean vomiting in her bathtub and losing my watch.
It was an entirely appropriate time and place for sexual thoughts.
That doesn't make it ok to play by play me your honeymoon!
He only has one ball. it was like fucking a cyclops.
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