Non-Jews are for practice
Yeah I'm pretty much like lane on gilmore girls except my mom doesn't look so mean all the time.
they have pregnancy tests at the dollar store
I feel like that is one of those things that you should not cheap out on.
I just smoked pot in front of my old Elementary School. It's like my Childhood and Adulthood are coming together in this awesome thing.
so the plumber came, he found condoms, feathers and glitter in the pipes.
hey as creepy as this sounds i still have your eyelashes on my desk
the girl next to me at the bar JUST looked down at her vagina and said "im going to get you fed". if i come home alone tonight...i give you permission to cut off my penis
I remember three things: you falling down an entire flight of stairs, me stripping out of your Christmas one-sie to do cartwheels in my underwear, and people standing above me saying, "where did that bump on her head come from?"
Also, I was told I kept the antlers on the entire time. I'm deeming last night a success.
You get to be the grown up. Leave a ciabatta by his face.
She clicked her fingers, said "here boy!", and pointed at her vagina.
where are you?
talk to ya later, gotta sled down these stairs real quick
yeah well, its not like my astrogynecology class is teaching me what i need to know
im almost 90% sure there is no such thing as astrogynecology.
I found a guy who will take me to the Olive Garden and he is CONVENTIONALLY ATTRACTIVE.
How early is too early to start drinking when studying for the bar?
still can't believe dude took a personal call while he was balls deep in my mouth.
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