Yeah he is here but I can't let him know I am until he has like 30 min worth of drinks. so when he see me he isn't like "omg ew,NO!"
I have so much to learn from you, wise slut
I had just got her shirt off when I realized that I was about to fuck Chewbacca from Star Wars. The way she moaned confirmed that I was.
well i just set every background of each phone in the verizon store to my face
I just noticed that when I sneeze...my nipples get hard.
your mom just called me and asked me why i'm not in jail with you right now.
I think they can follow the trail of blood to my house if they have a problem with me taking a dip in their hot tub last night b4 stepping on a broken bottle
Carpe scrotum. Grab life by the balls.
Believe me. As soon as the boss man is out the door. I am on my way to wow your vagina with my horse-like attributes.
They ran out of ice at the party, so I fixed my drink with frozen broccoli....the show must go on!
Dude that's beautiful. I've never heard of someone smoking with their bunny.
I feel like I have a connection with him. A marijuana-induced-spiritual connection.
The bend and snap? 98% success rate of getting attention. When used appropriately, it has an 83% rate of return on a dinner invitation.
We need to make boob twerking a thing. I feel like that's why vine was invented
The body is still out there. I don't think my trainer realized when he asked me not to drink for 24 days, how often I see dead people
The shrooms were awesome. Everyone's bones in their face looked so beautiful! Everyone had great face structures.
if you want the landscaping job, the uniform is a speedo. no exceptions.
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