Job is the problem. Drinking, the solution.
We just made watching Intervention into a drinking game. We drink everytime someone does drungs.
Gave out candy dressed as a porn star...bet you can guess how the mothers kept reacting.
and if it starts getting weird im just going to tell him i used to be a man
we tried to steer you away from them but you just kept yelling 'i need dick' and going back. sorry.
My near death experience also doubled as my coming out story
they all just nodded
help me choose which girl to send myself boning to my girlfriend to make her want to break up
which one looks the most like her?
I figured out plans for New Year's and by figuring out I mean I've got a sugar bowl of cocaine. Start at 10?
I was afraid someone would drug test my pants so you set them on fire.
If you need anything just hit me up
Pancakes
Noted.
As a plus, I've lost 5 pounds in two days, so "party all weekend" is officially a valid diet plan.
But what if there are 6 people and they end up just pairing the off into 3 couples. Is it still an orgy?
easy for you to say. you're not the one who has to explain why you woke up with a pineapple and a used condom.
my mom is drunk and is trying to get me to take a picture of her ass. what is life?
He told his wife he was too old to pretend to be straight. She tried to argue. He walked two tables over and was like this is my highschool sweetheart and he's an excellent fuck, we're running away together. It was epic.
Randomize
